Tim Slagle

A humble stand up comedian, fighting a never-ending battle for Truth, Justice, and the American Way.

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An experiment by a central Illinois community college explains why green energy is such a bust.

Four hundred years after Cervantes penned Don Quixote, fighting windmills seems to make more sense, than the windmills themselves.

Well, they make no sense for the consumer. If you’re General Electric, you’re bringing in $6.3 billion a year from the sale of wind turbines, thanks to generous government subsidies. It’s strange that people so adamant about making GE pay their all taxes, have no qualms about giving them large bundles of cash to put up these Bird Processors.

The idea is, that government subsidies will expand the industry, improve the technology, and make wind power viable. It’s expected that eventually “sustainable” energy can sustain itself. But that doesn’t seem to be happening.

According to the Daily Caller, Lake Land College, in Matoon Illinois, took almost a million taxpayer dollars to put up a couple windmills that have produced only $8500 in electricity over the past four years.

They also spent another quarter million dollars in parts and labor, to keep the turbines working. And after one was hit by lightning, another $100,000 will be needed to get it working again. It’s strange that you wouldn’t have insurance on these things, especially in Illinois where lightning often triggers insurance claims, sometimes when there hasn’t even been a storm.

But I guess when you get something for nothing, you don’t pay attention to those kind of details. So rather than repair the turbines, they’ll tear them down.

Lake Land College has academic programs in Agriculture; Business; Technology and Social Science & Education. They should also teach a course in Irony. Because according to Kelly Allee, Director of Public Relations: The turbines “are not a good teaching tool if they are not working.”

Actually, they have been a marvelous teaching tool. Because they’re teaching young people an important lesson about crony capitalism. Perhaps the Windmills should be shifted from their Technology program, over to their Business school. (Or Education.)

Because according to Andrew Follett, these wind turbines produced a negative 99.14% return on investment. You’d actually be better off betting on the Cubs to win the World Series, because that bet pays off at least once every hundred years.

Initial projections that the turbines would save the college $44,000 annually. And apparently, college administrators are hard to teach. Because rather than writing off Green Energy entirely, they’re embarking on an optimistic new project:

Lake Land plans to replace the two failed turbines with a solar power system paid for by a government grant. “[T]he photovoltaic panels are expected to save the college between $50,000 and $60,000 this year,” Allee told the DCNF.

Don Quixote would be proud.