Tim Slagle

A humble stand up comedian, fighting a never-ending battle for Truth, Justice, and the American Way.

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Magnets. They’ve been a source of amazement for centuries, and anyone who has ever played with a couple of them can understand why primitive people thought they were powered by witchcraft. What I don’t understand, is why some people still find the behavior of magnets supernatural. In a day when their mysterious powers can be explained for the price of  an Intro to Electromagnetic Theory credit hour, people still ascribe magical powers to magnets.

If you believe everything people tell you, magnets can cure arthritis and cancer, purify water, and make gasoline last forever. And if you line them up just perfectly, you can make a motor that will generate unlimited electricity and put the power companies out of business. All you have to do is send $19.95 to a post office box that will likely be closed by the time the postal inspectors get there.

It’s some pretty incredible stuff. But this latest theory is even more amazing. Apparently they can also cure right wing thought. Well they’re not exactly calling it “right wing thought”, they’re calling it a disruption of “.. the brain region that usually helps detect and respond to threats…”. According to the Daily Express

A bizarre experiment claims to be able to make Christians no longer believe in God and make Britons open their arms to migrants in experiments some may find a threat to their values.
Scientists looked at how the brain resolves abstract ideological problems.
Using a technique called transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS), researchers safely shut down certain groups of neurones in the brains of volunteers.

What is interesting is that belief in the healing powers of electromagnetism borders on religion. Is it possible to use magnets to change the brains of people, so they no longer buy magnetic healing bracelets? It seems to me if  magnets can can make you skeptical of religion, they will also make you skeptical of magical magnetism. So the more successful the experiment, the less likely that scientists are willing to attempt it.

I know the findings of this study were published in a psychology journal, but you have to take that with a grain of rare earth. A recent study found that only 39% of the studies published in psychology journals could be replicated. Which means it’s more than likely that the scientists conducting this study were just as susceptible to belief in the supernatural as their test subjects.

Now I’m not saying you can’t alter someone’s brain with magnetism. I’m quite certain that microwaves focused on the appropriate portion of a persons head will render him completely incapable of performing simple math, or retaining the drool on the inside of his mouth. Of course outside of certain Dystopian societies, such therapy isn’t really considered “medicine”.

Which brings up another side of this article that makes me a little uncomfortable. Exactly whom is deciding that religious beliefs and strict immigration policies are mental conditions that need to be treated? This reminds me of experiments that were done in the former Soviet Union, where skepticism of Communism was once considered a treatable disease.

Thank goodness we live in a country where freedom of thought is cherished, and we fully believe that right wing thoughts can only be treated with exposure to IRS audits.

 

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